My Gran Booth was one of those people who radiated warmth. People knew her and loved her. She was someone they greeted with a smile, made time for, were pleased to see.
I think part of her appeal was that she was just a completely genuine person. She had no agenda, saw the best in everyone and I don’t think I ever saw her truly angry.
She ran the church Brownie pack which meant I kind of had to share her a little as all my friends knew her and loved her too, but she made sure me and my sister and brothers felt special. We knew she was ours and we were hers.
As I grew older I was not a very confident child, but when I was with her I was lively, cheeky, talkative and completely myself. There was no other adult in my life that I was able to be that carefree with and I cherished her. If I was ever naughty she just had to give me ‘that look’ and I would be desperate to make amends, but then she would smile and I knew I was forgiven and the cloud would lift.
I lost my Gran when I was eleven years old. I talked recently about the last time I saw her in this post.
This had quite a devastating affect on me in many ways. Don’t get me wrong, I come from a loving family, but I always felt my Gran understood me a little bit more and that we were very similar. We looked alike, we were both a little on the chubby side, we laughed and sneezed loudly and often took people under our wings if we felt they were a little bit lost or low.
For so many years after she died I felt a little piece of me was gone too. I was so angry that I hadn’t known her as an adult. I wondered about what made her laugh, what made her cross, what her politics were.
I felt cheated, wounded, and bit by bit I felt her slipping away more and more.
This left me with such an empty feeling, and also guilt because I mustn’t have loved her enough, otherwise I wouldn’t feel so far away from her. I was losing her again but I didn’t know how to get her back.
Recently though,when I began writing my book I found her again. It wasn’t that I’d consciously based the gran in my story on her, but as I wrote a scene where my 11 year old main character had her nose powdered by her gran, I smelt the powder, and I remembered watching my gran putting her powder on and asking why.
Gran: “Because ladies don’t like their faces to be shiny”, she replied, dabbing a little on my freckled nose and holding her compact up for me to see. I remember thinking how funny that was, and how my shiny kids nose looked much nicer but I didn’t say as I didn’t want to make her sad.
In that moment, when I read over my words, I knew she was still with me. Because even if I forget events, places, her voice, I could never forget her presence, her smell and the way she made me feel.
David asked ‘who was the most important person in your childhood?’ My answer is my Gran, and even though I thought I’d left her there, I now know that I brought her with me.
This is a photo of my Gran in her guiders uniform. She was already very ill with cancer here I think, but she kept on running the Brownies right until a week before she died.
She was only 65.
She was amazing.
If you’d like to reply to David’s question, please link to him and leave a comment here so that he can visit and read.
{ 14 comments… read them below or add one }
My grandfather was the most important person in my childhood. He and my grandmother raised me from a toddler, and he’s just an amazing man.
He has prostate cancer, and has for years now, and for some odd reason, I’ve steeled myself to believe that he will never die. He just can’t. I don’t think I could handle it.
She sounds simply fab. My Grandad died when I was 8 and I still miss him. I’d like to have known him as an adult too. I’ll show you a photo of him in his Scout Uniform next weekend
This is such a lovely ‘tribute’ to your Grandmother’s memory and your relationship with one another. Thanks for sharing.
I’ve published Camera Critters and Unconscious Mutterings at Small Reflections … Blog your Blessings and Sacred Life Sunday at Sacred Ruminations today.
Hugs and blessings,
Gosh she was only my age when she died. That was a lovely tribute for your Gran. So pleased that you had this special relationship with her. I enjoyed reading this post & shall be putting in mine tomorrow!
PS ………. Just went to your post “Those Three Words” and I was really moved by them. Very good and both written with feeling!
Maria, I totally understand that. I still miss my gran now, but I also know I’m so lucky to have had her in my life and I will ever forget her. Heavy stuff though.
Belle, she was, and I can’t wait to see that photo. I bet it’s gorgeous.
Storyteller thank you so much. And I enjoyed your 5 special things.
Maggie May, my mum has just turned 60 and is so young, I think that’s why I’m still a little angry sometimes. She had so much life left in her. But I’m still glad that I had a chance to know her. I’ll pop over and read yours tomorrow. Thanks you.
My nana died when I was 15, but it is lovely to have the same middle name as hers.
It was a good, deep question by David.
I know the answer, but have to formulate the wording!
It was my mum.
Dxx
Very sweet memories. I think she would be tickled to know you write with her in mind, powdered nose and all.
any gran of yours is a gran of … wait, that doesn’t really work.
how ’bout, i loves me some jo-gran? no, that’s disrespectful.
okay. try “she seems like a lovely lady, and she wears that uniform well.”
okay *that* wasn’t disrespectful or weird. well, okay it was a bit weird.
Oh, Jo. My Granny was my very favorite relative. I treasure every photo and memory of the times we spent together. Your post caused a little flood and made me want to pull out my photos, but it’s too late for tonight.
Yes, she had the most influence on me in many ways….hurrah for the grans who love us more than anyone.
Oh, you brought back such wonderful memories for me! I adored my Grandma. She was a pillar of strength, yet the kindest person I will ever know. The powder story reminded me of my Grandma’s tiny, little Avon lipsticks she used to keep in her top drawer. She used to hand them out to us girls and say they were “just our size”.
Denise yours was wonderful. She sounds like an amazing lady.
Bee I hope so.
Holl, I love you. And she would have too, I’m sure.
PixelPI, yes. Hurrah.
Momo, we used to have those tiny Avon lipsticks too. So cute.
Beuatiful, Jo. And I really enjoyed your Walk post, too.
I like the way you used your “words”. Very nice Fun Monday post.
Jennifer
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