It’s June, so it’s officially nearly summer right?
We’re ready.
Ok, not really, this is just how they watch TV sometimes. I have no idea why.
Seriously though, this time of year really annoys me.
Not because of the slick cool streaks of rain that wash my windows and give everything I see through them a shimmer of otherworldly disjointed movement.
Not because Misses E and M can’t play in the garden because even though it is warm outside we might as well be living in a marsh. I have this image in my head of a small circle of wood pushing its way from the depths of the quagmire that is my lawn. It grows bigger by the hour until a small boat surfaces and its skeleton crew, wearing bright yellow sou’westers and oil coats, wave slowly in time with the rocking motion of the boat. Or Paddington Bear in his sou’wester sits there munching soggy marmalade sandwiches, then floats aimlessly through the hedge into next doors uncharted waters.
And, not because my floors will not stay clean due to the river of footprints that flow through my house. I mean, you know me right? My house is not exactly a homage to ‘the God of Spotlessly Clean and Not at all Messy Things’.
No, what really annoys me is conversations like this;
Random Person: “Can you believe the weather?”
Random Person: Isn’t it miserable?
Random Person: Looks like we’ve had our summer.
Random Person: I reckon it’s settled in for the night.
Random Person: And it’s meant to be staying like this for the next few days/weeks/months.
Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
And what annoys me even more is that I feel the urge to join in. I slip into the pattern of “Oh I know, it’s vile isn’t it? Tsk.” Shiver.
So, I ahve made a decision. Next time another random person makes another comment about how the weather is vile and is going to continue to be this way for the next 50′000 years I am going to say this;
“Really, you don’t like it? I love this weather. We all go down to the woods, strip down to our Homer Simpson pants and dance to the music of panpipes while balancing small fruit items and various vegetables on top of our heads, which we have previously flattened by stacking white goods and large rocks on top of them and carrying them round for an hour a week during Top Gear or The Antiques Roadshow. (Deep breath.) Then we eat cantaloupe melons and take it in turns to shave each others feet.”
That should stop ‘em.
Please note. This post was written in response to David’s weekend wandering question, ‘When did you last complain about the weather?‘ which he will be posing on Sunday June 8th 2008. I can time travel me.
{ 19 comments… read them below or add one }
What Would Paddington Do?
As a matter of fact, I say that very thing, but I do shave my own feet.
I happen to love the rain but this is why I live in the rainy pacific NW. We don’t tan, we rust.
Regarding that last paragraph…please post pictures!
or you could just go out and make mud pies for tea….
I won’t mention the rain we had today but late this evening the sun came out I have just watched the most beautiful sunset~ so maybe your girls got it right! BTW my two used to do exactly that back in the 70’s!
I don’t care for rain either. But no matter WHAT the weather is, some people are not satisfied. Summer is too hot/humid. Spring is too damp/rainy/cloudy. Winter is too snowy/cold/windy. Fall is too chilly/grey/dry.
There is always something to complain about with things we cannot control. Speaking of which… HAHA. Just kidding.
Can you believe this weather?
Oh. Sorry.
*snigger*
sounds fine to me. (oh, that Angela)
We have the exact opposite. No rain for days and days and days. Let’s meet in the middle.
I don’t often lol….but I lol’ed all over the place after reading that. Love you Jo! Mwah!
you see when YOU talk about weather, it’s fun. i totally totally wish i wasn’t going to think of this next time i shave my feet.
OH ! i mean - i dont shave my feet…
Maybe you should come live with me, I haven’t had decent rain for seven years!
love the paddington….so cute. YOu are so creative like that. I love that about you.
Love the girls in their suits and flippers. what a crack up.
I am doing good. No worries here….just been a busy month. I am happy for June to be here.
I don’t want to rain on your parade but this poor weather looks like……..
Aw, see - now I demand a picture to go along with your new response!
Haha
I dare you to say that with the most straight possible face. I would love to hear what reaction you get and please blog about it. I don’t mind the weather at all, I just mind the passing of time, it is going too quickly and I can’t catch up.Could someone help me slow it down a bit?
It’s June alright…the weatherman said the high would be 91, but on my porch, it reads 101 already…shows what the weatherman knows…but I’m with you, you can’t change the weather, just enjoy the weather you’ve got…sort of a variance on the theme of love the one you’re with!
Sandi
Bee, Paddington would probably throw his marmalade sandwiches at them.
Momo, I might.
Mie, mud pies would be good. Especially when you hear what Miss M would be cooking if she had the chance.
chrisb, today we had bright sunshine. Who’d have thought it?
Susan, that’s exactly it. And they say it like they know, like they are a weather oracle. Arghhhhh.
AOJ, LOL.
Jan, me too. And Angela is such a one. Hee hee.
Lori, good idea. Though wouldn’t that be in the ocean???
Kim, I love you too. Mwah.
Holl, I believe you, about the feet. No honest I do.
Willowtree, I’m packing my bags.
Corey, big hugs. Glad you’re good. x
Belle definitely. I always find radish are good.
Bad dumdad, stop it.:D
Sybil, it might scare you.
Nora, I want time to slow down too, I have so much to do. And I wouldn’t dare say that really, I’m a wuss. I’ll try to remember it when I’m drunk. I get braver then.
Sandi that is perfect. Love the weather you have.
Hah! Well, were the kids at least watching a show about swimming??? They had on their suits; perhaps they SHOULD have gone out in the rain.
We had such a storm on the weekend I was sure an Ark was going to float by…
Have you ever beento Belgium? I’ve seen a day start out with rain and 50 °F, get beautiful and sunny and warm and then by evening a snowstorm blows over and brings sand from the Sahara with it.
No, really, that just happened like,last week.
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