Miss M is having an identity crisis.
Yesterday, she cried because her eyes weren’t blue.
The day before she cried because the wind made her hair ‘crazy’ and ‘not beautiful anymore.’
And last night she cried because she was too small and not ‘bigger bigger’ like her cousin ME who is four.
After a long day with a tired and grumpy Miss M who is obviously becoming more aware of her own individuality and that she is different to others in ways she doesn’t always like, I am a tired and grumpy Mummy. As I lay beside her in her little bed and look at my weary child, sated by stories and milk, my heart jumps as I see her yet again screw her little face into that now familiar expression and murmur the words,
Miss M: “My want to be bigger bigger now Mummy. My want to be four. My want to have big girls shoes.”
I take a deep breathe, more to calm myself than anything else, and look at my tiny girl. Then a thought hits me.
Me: “M, you will be a big girl soon enough, but right now you are the perfect size for a Miss M.”
She stares up at me with her big hazel/brown/greeny/grey eyes (they are beautiful), and waits to hear more.
Me: “But you won’t grow unless you sleep M. That’s when we do our best growing. When all the world is quiet and we don’t have to do any talking or running or jumping, then our body can really concentrate and get on with growing.”
Miss M holds my gaze then grins.
Miss M: “So my need to go to sleep, and then my will be bigger bigger?”
Me: “Yes, you need to sleep and then you will grow.”
Miss M hugs me then closes her eyes and a soft smile lingers on her face. I close my eyes too and lay with her a while. About ten minutes later I feel a movement and open my right eye.
Miss M: “Look Mummy. My growed alldee -ready (Miss M speak for already.)”
I stifle a giggle as I see my little girl staring up at her out stretched arms reaching towards the ceiling excitedly.
Me: “They might have grown a little babe, but you need to sleep all night to really grow a lot.”
She pulls her arms back down and hooks them round my right arm so that my hand is inches from her face. Then she closes her eyes and her breathing slows. When I feel it warm and calm and regular against my hand I gently slip my arm from hers, stroke her head, kiss her gently then tiptoe from the room.
I have the power.
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June 28th, 2008 at 6:45 am
Oh you do have the power! Too sweet! And she will grow far too quickly!
June 28th, 2008 at 7:08 am
Oh the sorrow of their growing so fast, thinking it’s so slow and before you know it they’ve gone out your door and into their own…tell Miss M to slow down!
hugs
Sandi
June 28th, 2008 at 8:07 am
Ah, how sweet!
June 28th, 2008 at 8:24 am
big girl shoes are an important thing. And you coming up with the sleep angle was perfect! Smart Jo…
June 28th, 2008 at 10:20 am
Ah psychology!
June 28th, 2008 at 11:41 am
lovely! my question is…..did she ask if she is four yet when she woke up this morning? Sugar gets really upset everyday that she isn’t four yet! sigh…..
June 28th, 2008 at 12:20 pm
That is so sweet and you handled it beautifully!
June 28th, 2008 at 1:11 pm
Aww how cute!
June 28th, 2008 at 3:53 pm
so…wait…i grew because i *slept* so much? jeeeez. if someone would have told me that years ago…
right, i got me some eatin’ to do, and i’m never going to sleep again.
June 28th, 2008 at 7:48 pm
I know I’m pregnant and hormonal and all that, but that made my eyes well up with tears. Isn’t it amazing how simple and profound their problems are all at once? And isn’t it even more amazing how little it takes to calm their fears and settle their minds? Ohhh… to sleep like that again.
Brilliantly done, Jo.
June 28th, 2008 at 7:52 pm
How cute she sounds! She will surely grow fast enough!
June 29th, 2008 at 3:44 am
I think this is a perfect post, you really say it all. Being a parent is like being a superhero isn’t it?
I remember my niece at 3 breaking her heart for days over not having blond hair, even now at almost 6 she stills gets upset over it. Noone knows why
June 29th, 2008 at 6:32 am
Karisma, that is so true, Miss E, her big sister,is nearly eight now and I can’t believe it. Sighhhh.
Sandi oh that’s so sad. I tell them to slow down in all the time in my head, but you just want to go go go when you’re small don’t you?
Dumdad it was, but a little sad too in some ways. She always leaves me with a smile though.
Mie, big girls shoes are soooo important, hee hee.
Akela, you have to try right?
Corey she didn’t but she is sooooo desperate to be four. I think it’s mainly because her cousin is 8 months older so is already four so it’s a constant reminder as she sometimes calls M little while she is a big girl of four. I mean, they’re not even three and a half yet, it’s mad isn’t it.
Lilacspecs, thank you
Maria, cuteness is in abundance when they’re this age isn’t it.
Holl, me too. babe.
Lovely Debs thank you, and you’re so right, simple yet profound is a perfect way to put it, as for them at that moment it’s the biggest thing in the world. Fab comment.
Lisa she will, too too fast. Boo.
Laura thanks. It’s so weird isn’t it? Miss E gets really sad because her friends all have bigger feet than her. I try to tell her that it’s nice for a lady to be a little petite and that I would have loved to have been but she just wants to be like everyone else and be up a few sizes. I suppose it’s a girl thing, we never quite feel perfect do we.
June 29th, 2008 at 8:43 am
So it was the sleeping I got wrong?
Fabulous post, my sweet
June 29th, 2008 at 3:35 pm
Belle, no, you got it all right sweetie, which is why you are gorgeous.
June 30th, 2008 at 2:03 pm
Aww, how sweet!
July 2nd, 2008 at 4:01 pm
Lori, it so was. I’m glad I have a tool to make her slee now though.