This week, Fun Monday comes from three lovely ladies, Min, Stephanie and Margaret at Mama Drama who are always witty, insightful and a lot of fun.
They say: ” Somewhere in your past education, you picked up some little bit of useless information that you’ve never forgotten. What is it?”
Hmmmm. Well there are two things that spring to mind here. The first is from my first year at secondary school when I was 11. The Head Teacher, Mr Whalley taught us all one lesson of RE (Religious Education) each week. He only taught first years so I’m sure it was just a way for him to learn our names and work out who was going to be trouble.
Anyway, he was a very ‘anal’ teacher. (Sorry Mr Whalley’s family, but he really was). He made us cover our books in brown paper, then we spent a whole lesson putting our names on the cover. Yes, I said A WHOLE lesson, that’s one hour folks. He took us through it step…by…step and stopped at each stage fr everyone to, er, catch up. We had to measure so that our name was 3 cm from the top, 2cm from the side, that there was exactly 1cm between each line, and that we had four lines parallel to each other so that we could write, our name, RE, ‘Mr Whalley’, and out tutor group on each one. He was so strict about it that people got detention if it wasn’t neat enough or we’d measured wrong or if we’d done too much rubbing out.
The word ‘ar*ehole’ comes to mind, but I didn’t say words like that when I was 11 so I probably thought he was a bit of a weirdo or something.
For one of his lessons we had to learn a paragraph on leprosy, then he picked on people randomly to recite it and gain a star or lose a playtime depending how well they did. It was kind of mean really as if you were nervous and buggered it up you were punished, and some people who hadn’t bothered weren’t even picked, but in his infinite wisdom this was the method Mr Whalley decided on.
I was so terrified of being picked that I hammered it into my brain fo a whole week. I didn’t get picked, but I can still remember some of it now.
Cough. Clearing throat.
“Leprosy is not an easy disease to catch. It is widespread in hot countries but is rare in Europe. Leprosy is a disease of the nerves. It usually begins with small light patches appearing on the skin of the arms legs or torso…”
Ok, that’s only a little bit but it was 22 years ago you know. Tsk.
The other thing I remember is that ‘trephining’ is when a special tool is used to remove a part of a persons skull, while they are still ALIVE. It was one of the earliest operations carried out and my history teacher said that nobody ever remembered what ‘trephining’ was in exams so he’d be amazed if we did. I’m thinking now that maybe this was a cunning plan as I think we all remembered, I mean, kids like gory stuff like that don’t they?
Mwah ha ha haaaaa.
Now go and see the Mama Drama team for more back to school Fun Mondays. You won’t regret it. And if you’ve got time leave, tell me that random thing you learnt at school and never forgot. In fact, nevermind if you’ve got time, just do it because you love me. 
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August 25th, 2008 at 1:46 am
The one thing I can remember being told from school wasn’t really anything to with education (what does that tell you!) but our headteacher took us for a lesson, I don’t remember what it was and he said that if he didn’t smoke he could have bought 2 bmw’s. So I remember thinking I’m never going to smoke and I’ll get myself a bmw. That “advice” turned out to be useless as I’ve never so much as picked up a cigarette and I’m nowhere near being able to afford a bmw! (to be fair it may have something to do with my addiction to shopping!). Does this count?!
August 25th, 2008 at 2:21 am
The Magna Carta was signed in 1215. Just before lunch (our lunchtime started at 12.20).
August 25th, 2008 at 2:44 am
Hi Rachael my lovely. That is perfect. They told us such daft stuff didn’t they? That reminds me of my primary head teacher who was a heavy smoker and told us that ‘No Smoking’ was actually a person named Nos Mo King. What a great big liar!! Hope the little monkeys are ok. E and M and Mr B send hugs.
Lola, now that is a great way to remember that.
August 25th, 2008 at 3:13 am
I still like gory stuff. roflmao
I’m not to sure about reading up on leprosy tho.
Loved this Fun Monday. Mine is posted. Hopefully this is a bit on the ‘FUNny side’ too. Drop by if you can, won’t you? Happy day to you.
August 25th, 2008 at 4:33 am
It is the gory stuff that kids remember isn’t it?
I remember studying about the Galveston Hurricane and learning that after the storm they sent the dead bodies out to sea on rafts. And of course the tide brought them right back again.
I barely remember anything that wasn’t gross LOL
August 25th, 2008 at 5:21 am
The space between the cornea and the lens of the eye is filled wuth aqueous humor and the actual eyeball is filled with vitreous humor. Aqueous humor can regenerate if the cornea is damaged, but vitrous humor cannot regenerate if the eyeball is punctured.
August 25th, 2008 at 5:26 am
How horrible!
August 25th, 2008 at 6:05 am
Sounds like Mr. Whalley needed a girlfriend. . .but look at it this way, now you’ll know if your kiddos ever get leprosy and be able to ship them right off to a colony. That way, all the Madonnas for Jo!
August 25th, 2008 at 6:07 am
King Nash Came Marching Along Zion Ferry Probably Cutting Agag’s Aunt . I was 11 when I learnt that. I’ve spent years trying for forget it. It’s an mnemonic for the reactivity of metals and their chemical symbols: K – Potassium, Na – Sodium, Ca – Calcium, Mg – Marching, Al – Aluminium, Zi – Zinc, Fe – Iron, Pb – Lead, Cu – Copper, Ag – Silver, Au – Gold.
August 25th, 2008 at 6:48 am
Leprosy and skulls, eh? Sounds like Catholic school. And were you ever asked that question on an exam?
August 25th, 2008 at 7:28 am
I suspect that Mr. Whalley had a trephining gone awry. I don’t know how Sadistic people get through the vetting. whew.
August 25th, 2008 at 7:32 am
Trephining – I am pretty sure I’ll never forget that now, too! Crazy!
That teacher – geez! What a freak!!
My teachers were all fairly normal, i think. Wait.. no – that’s wrong. Still – not as nutty as Mr. Whalley!
August 25th, 2008 at 7:39 am
Hmmmm…7th grade. My teacher gave us an automatic “f” if there was a single erasure mark on our paper. Maybe they were all just REALLY tired by then!
The only thing I remember learning about lepers was that they lived in Hawaii. There’s a tourism fact you don’t often hear any more.
August 25th, 2008 at 7:48 am
I made egg ovals in writing for a year and cut open so many blasted frogs in blaated fermaldehyde bleh
August 25th, 2008 at 8:15 am
Ha Reverse psychology works a treat!
August 25th, 2008 at 8:21 am
That teacher is so whacked out! And for some reason i remember a Japanese song that i learned in 5th grade!
August 25th, 2008 at 9:11 am
Funny that you remember so much. You reminded me that I do remember the little waiver I had to repeat to every customer when they called about insurance claims.
August 25th, 2008 at 9:25 am
It’s amazing what you can remember from school isn’t it?
August 25th, 2008 at 9:27 am
trephining – there are some thing rolling around in my brain that I would like to scoop out but alas I fear they would take the wrong parts.
August 25th, 2008 at 10:25 am
First I misread the tast/question and thought ‘if we didnt remember how could we share’ .. doh .. then I got into what you remembered and forgot I was supposed to be remembering some inane piece of triva. By the time I did try to remember I was overcome with the cuteness of your PC (politically correct) rendering of 3 kidlettes. Neat.
So what trivia did I learn that I still recall .. well … um … I’ll have to get back to you …
August 25th, 2008 at 10:31 am
I understand why fear can cause something to be stuck in your head forever.
August 25th, 2008 at 11:08 am
I remember learning an acronym in French class. Dr. and Mrs. Vandertramp.
Which is hilarious considering who I ended up marrying. Tee hee.
August 25th, 2008 at 12:01 pm
Yikes – none of that trephoning for me, please.
August 25th, 2008 at 12:19 pm
James I of England had poor personal hygiene, bad breath and piles. I have no idea if this is true, but I remember one of the girls in the class reading it out of the text book, and the rest of us dissolving in fits of giggles. Poor old James I – he probably stands just inside the pearly gates, stopping new entrants and saying “I didn’t. Honestly. The historians made it up.”
August 25th, 2008 at 2:00 pm
Hi Jo,
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We are interested in seeing if you would like to review some of our products on your site. Let me know if you’d like to discuss it further. Thanks, Jo.
August 25th, 2008 at 2:40 pm
When I was 10 (fifth grade) we moved from Virginia to Pennsylvania. Every day in class the children would pick me to read from the bible (they liked my southern accent) I hated to read in front of the class but if you did something wrong this Yankee teacher would hit your hands with a ruler or send you to the principal who would make you touch your toes and hit you on the bottom. Everyone seemed so much more grown up than I did, they listened to the radio and danced during lunch. It was January 1962 and I could no longer spell -the words sounded all wrong when a Yankee said them. I can not remember one thing I learned that year -except I was fat -oh I didnt just get fat -but i was aware of it for the first time. I can remember my exact weight . shudder. I learned what a Pennsylvania rock quarry was and no stood up when we sang Dixie in music class!
August 25th, 2008 at 2:55 pm
I bet Mr. Whalley’s family realized he was anal. Good grief he sounds crazy.
August 25th, 2008 at 2:56 pm
You got more fun facts out of your readers than we got from the whole FunMonday assignment. Your readers are the coolest!!!
(Don’t you just love leprosy stories?)
August 25th, 2008 at 5:12 pm
No one quite as Insufferable as your Mr. Whalley in my childhood. But I do have a few odd sequiliqies that run through my head like-
“What a piece of work is a man… From Hamlet It was 7th grade and the stuff old teacher whated one of us bright young scholar said with disdain to give him a line from Hamlet and it was an F if all we could come up with was To Be or Not To Be that is the Question. I rose and gave the whole What a pice of work is man… guess the old fart never hear of the muical “Hair”.
August 25th, 2008 at 6:02 pm
Wow, he was a real jewel, wasn’t he?! Those are some great stories.
August 25th, 2008 at 6:22 pm
Methinks your mind is an intriguing thing indeed … and reminds me of my sister’s. She would remember Leprosy and trephining … while I’d do my best to forget both as soon as possible ;–)
Hugs and blessings,
August 25th, 2008 at 6:31 pm
Your Mr. Whalley sounds like my Sister Mary Philomena…she was also the RE teacher and I remember the brown book covers…and she ruled with a …wait for it…RULER…gave me a crack across the knuckles that left a bruise and Mama went to the school and I’m sure had to go to confession and do penance after lol…I’m told she was “very salty” lol
hugs
Sandi
August 25th, 2008 at 8:31 pm
Hey, I think I had Mr. Anal’s sister for a teacher once. I totally remember having to cover books in brown paper and measure where the name went. I always wondered, even then, what this was meant to teach us?!?! Ha! Thanks for the crazy memory flashback.
Come by and check out Pet Peeve Tuesday!
August 26th, 2008 at 12:18 am
school days always sound much more fun when you look back on them!
August 26th, 2008 at 12:54 am
Hi Jo,
I can still recite a quote about Impressionism which I have to say has been crucial to my adult life and development and so worthwhlie learning…pffft!
August 26th, 2008 at 9:39 am
OH MY! I have never heard of this barbaric thing before! Ew.
I loved your crazy teacher story though!
August 26th, 2008 at 1:18 pm
Picklesister’s school had a ‘leprosy auction’ last term. Was REALLY hoping she didn’t bid for a leper to bring home!
August 26th, 2008 at 3:13 pm
Hee hee, I love all your answers. It seems Mr Whalley was not the only one.
August 26th, 2008 at 5:50 pm
oh crap i can NOT remember anything! um. i really really remember that i shouldn’t have had my halloween mask on so tight because it meant i couldn’t see the kids in front of me turn during our march. i kept on marching out to the north 40. and i, um, didn’t do it again…??