So you’re at a big family occasion, family you don’t often see. It’s a 30th birthday and our star guest has come all the way from Berlin. Only three other people there have ever met Miss M, to the rest she is an unopened book, a sweet new addition. I’m really looking forward to them seeing both my little girls.
Miss E was about 4 last time they saw her. She was cheeky and giggly and a little shy. Now she is 8, She is still cheeky and giggly but has an added maturity that shows it’s face every now and then, like when she is looking after her tiny niece on the slide, or stopping her little sister from attempting to slide down the pole that must be about 10 feet from the ground.
Miss M is the typical 3 year old whirlwind. She looks like an angel but spends the whole time wanting to play. We bribe her with promises of gifts, we’re prepared to threaten her with loss of privileges (i.e. TV), but all in all she pretty much rises to the occasion as long as she’s occupied. It’s amazing how much entertainment you can get from a scattering of shiny number 30s. No really, we were amazed.
After the birthday girl had blown out the candles we headed outside to the play area once more and Mr B and I sat sharing a drink and chatting with family and friends. Then I heard Mr B utter the words, “Miss M, noooooo.”
I look up and there before me is my small child, knickers round her ankles, pretty party dress pulled up, small white bottom glowing in the sunlight like an oddly shaped mushroom against the green grass.
I run. It’s like one of those slow motion moments from a film. I lift her up in the hope that I can prevent her from wetting her underwear as I haven’t brought spare, but I’m too late. When she has finished, her pants, her legs and my arm are soggy and I turn round and laugh at Mr B as I sweep her up and back into the pub in the hope I can clean her up in the ladies.
As we enter the toilets Miss M shouts, “Hello ladies. ‘Scuse me ladies.” and I can do nothing but giggle at my little monster. We have a chat about how next time, if she needs a wee it would be best to ask Mummy or Daddy to help her, then I stand and dry her things for a few minutes and we head back out, Miss M looking just as angelic as usual.
Sighhhh, kids, they never let you down do they? Hee hee.
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August 31st, 2008 at 9:46 am
Hey – when you gotta go, you gotta go, right?!
Mushroom – funny.
August 31st, 2008 at 10:38 am
It could have been worse, she could have done a no2!
August 31st, 2008 at 1:31 pm
Sometimes a gal’s gotta go .. at least she pulled down her knickers!
And Akelamalu is right .. LOL ..
Mushroom is a hoot!
August 31st, 2008 at 3:11 pm
Sybil, too true, but I want her to learn a little, erm, social nicety, hee hee.
Akela, I was thinking that as I ran up to to her. “Please let it be a wee. Please let it be a wee.” LOL.
Daryl, Akela is so right.
August 31st, 2008 at 3:34 pm
i want to know if you butt-mushroom risotto was good.
August 31st, 2008 at 7:16 pm
another one for the memory bank sk
August 31st, 2008 at 7:32 pm
My daughter recently saw a friend (female, 3 yrs old) peeing like a boy in the privacy of her own back garden. She is trying to copy and perfect the technique, but has yet to master the oh-so-important “own back garden only” bit.
August 31st, 2008 at 11:41 pm
I just cant’ stop giggling thinking about this story. what a funny girl you have. sure sounds like she keeps you on your toes…and a bit damp. LOL
September 1st, 2008 at 12:15 am
Holl, that is so totally another story.
Sandy, yep, I’ll be keeping this one for her first boyfriend, hee hee.
Iota, LOL, it’s the finer details that make all the difference isn’t it?
Corey, yes, and yes. You wait, it’ll be Sugar next.
September 1st, 2008 at 6:19 pm
Oh my. Isn’t she sweet to bless you with all these memorable moments?