We’re sitting huddled on the smaller of my now decidedly saggy green sofas. Miss E is stretched out cat like on the larger one, comfortable in mismatched pyjamas, sleepy eyes glued determindly to the TV. Miss M, in her red Christmas nightie, snuggles closer and scratches behind her ear as she absently brushes a strand of soft brown hair from her eyes. Then she pushes my book from my hands and climbs clumsily onto my knee, all large head and gangly little limbs. I raise my head to avoid a short sharp Glasgow kiss as she lifts her eyes to meet mine and fixes me with a stare, lips pursed, eyebrows a ‘v’.
Miss M: ”Mummy. When you die will I get this house?”
I look into her serious little face and think for a moment. It’s one of those times where you feel you have to tread carefully. You know, when you think, ‘well this discussion could get a bit serious, or it could be nothing and you might over do it so go steady.’
Me: ”Cough. Erm, I don’t know M. I suppose it might be, but I’ll probably buy a different house by the time I’m very very old. Then you and E will get that one.”
Her eyes drift from my face down to my chest and her fingers toy with a button on my top. A soft smile crossing her face as she manages to undo it.
Miss M: “Try hard not to die won’t you?”
She slides off my knee and begins tumbling Polly Pocket cars from the roof of her bright plastic garage, death by 4 year old.
Me: I nod. ”I’ll try M. I’ll try.”
Miss E smiles at me and shakes her head and we both raise our eyebrows then look back at our little monkey and the pile of deceased plastic beside her.
I love it when E and I share these comedy moments. I love that my big girl finds my little girl just as sweet and charming and funny as I do. And I love that my little girl is in awe of her big sister, just as I am at times. I’m not saying this is what they’re like every hour of every day, I mean in our ‘possible swine flu’ isolation there have been grumpy moments, ’she said this, she did that’ moments, it would be weird if there wasn’t right? But in the end my kids love each other, and I love how that makes me feel.
Thanks for all your lovely comments and good wishes folks. We’re fine. We’ve been hearing of more and more friends being affected, but so far so good. Hope you’re all ok. I’ve been watching The Killers at T in the Park on BBC 3 while I’ve been writing this and am now so elated I may float to bed on a high. I’m getting my musical muse back and I like it. Don’t know why I ever let it go.
July 11th, 2009 at 4:11 pm
Lovely. I love it.
July 11th, 2009 at 6:46 pm
I hate it when little kids think about big adult scary things. But it comes. It surely comes. And it’s good to be around with time and attention to field the questions.
July 12th, 2009 at 1:46 am
For some reason, this post brought tears to my eyes, as I was transported back to childhood when I just dreaded anything happening to my mother.
Just read your last post and I am sorry that you have what seems to be swine flu in the family.
It is spreading fast here and I work in a school (scary!)
Oh well, it is all hyped up and we have all had flu before & recovered.
Hope you get over it fast.
The government is a bit late with these flu injections!
July 12th, 2009 at 2:18 am
What a lovely post
July 12th, 2009 at 4:03 am
It’s a good thing you have this blog to write all the cute moments in and we don’t mind one bit when you do. I’m trying to remember the cute moments of my kids, but my memory is failing, although I know there were many. Too bad there were no blogs back then. I didn’t even keep a diary, much to my disgust. I thought I wouldn’t forget.
July 12th, 2009 at 5:34 am
Aw how sweet! Good to hear you’re coping. My youngest son’s partner has just been diagnosed with swine flu.
Try to pop by my place tomorrow there’s a little something for you m’dear. x
July 12th, 2009 at 6:12 am
I thought you were giving ME your house in your will??
July 12th, 2009 at 1:12 pm
Ahh what a lovely post! x
July 13th, 2009 at 9:09 am
I have those moments with our two girls too and they just melt me. Sometimes they scrap it out royally, but they love each other to bits and it shows.