Jo Beaufoix | Archive

When Kids Go Wrong

28. February 2010

I am still poorly sick and look actually quite frightening in that mad haired, eye bagged, slightly green way, but I just wanted to share with you a conversation between my friend and their little one that made me howl. (Not like a wolf).
Little 3: ”Monty won’t do what I tell him.”
Friend N: ”Oh dear. [...]

It Is Bad To Eat Glass

26. February 2010

26 Comments

It is generally inadvisable to eat glass.
Even if you have very thick skin. Even if it is very thin glass. It is still inadvisable.
You’d think as a fairly intelligent 35 year old woman (gulp) I would know that by now.
You’d think as a sensible, mature mother of two I would have the foresight to think, [...]

Croup, Questions and More Goo on the Carpet

24. February 2010

28 Comments

Croup, Questions and More Goo on the Carpet

Miss M is curled up beside me. It’s 8.30am and I have already phoned the school as M has croup and has had a rough night and Miss E is also shattered with a chesty cough and is still asleep.
We lie quietly, the silence a pleasant contrast to the interrupted dark hours of coughing and [...]

Rabbit Thriller

22. February 2010

21 Comments

I’m a bit scared.
A certain member of the Beaufoix household has been acting a little strangely.
I’m not talking hormonal strange – you know, the kind where you forget complete conversations, go out in public wearing odd shoes and have very strange dreams about having a yeti’s bottom.
And I’m not talking kid strange, such as discussions [...]

The BEST News I’ve had in a Long Time

20. February 2010

8 Comments

The brilliant, hilarious, wise, sarcastic, humble, warm, honest, hopeful and just downright wonderful Xbox4Nappyrash has become a proud Daddy.
It’s been a long journey, fraught with medical intervention, trauma, distress, body parts, blood, sweat, tears and every other bodily fluid you can think of, but by God the ending is perfect and so so well deserved. [...]

The Charm of a 5 Year Old

19. February 2010

23 Comments

Slow and steady a small girl tackles the carpeted hill that leads the way to sleep. Each step is a quarter of her height, a full bend of her knee, an effort; yet onward and upward she plods, a soldier of fortune forging her weary way forward in the hope of rested limbs and gentle [...]

A Bit of a Tosser

17. February 2010

38 Comments

Oh my Bob I am so disproportionately proud.
Seriously, you’d think I’d managed to juggle a cart load of monkeys, a pound of prickly pears, the England Rugby team and a small prune.
Or that I’d achieved world peace through the sharing of chocolate
Or managed to woo David Tennant through the medium of the Morris dance while [...]

Oh My Ears

15. February 2010

59 Comments

I never believed it could happen.
To hear such language from my 9 year old, AND EVEN WORSE, to hear it at aimed at me, her mother – her moral compass, guardian of her social and emotional development, tidier upper of her very messy room, and giver of pocket money and Kinder Buenos.
We’re in the lounge [...]

Done

2. February 2010

54 Comments

I’m taking a little time away from my blog. It used to be a place of escape, somewhere safe, but right now, for whatever reason it has become something else. I don’t want to be part of the competition anymore I suppose. It was kind of all I had that was just for me and [...]

Reasons to be Cheerful Part II and Baby Bigamy or Pre-School Polygamy?

1. February 2010

9 Comments

This is yesterday’s post. Because I had reasons to be cheerful yesterday, but I erm, forgot to press publish. The body is a little more willing but the brain is still being a bit of a git. So, this is yesterday’s post today, and later there may be today’s post today, unless my brain plays [...]