You call out ‘goodbye.’ Maybe there’s a token peck on the cheek, a shared smile, a brief hug. The car pulls away and you go back to your book, your day, your life. Later you imagine them flying over the sea. They should be there now. Exploring the ancient city, fulfilling a dream, to see Rome.
Days pass, then there is a phone call and everything changes. Decisions are made, tickets are bought, arrangements completed. You want to go too but it’s not possible, too much money, and they can’t bring her back. She will never come home.
Years pass. You grow up, have children, then grandchildren. Then some friends plan a trip and you think of her. You have the photos. Your parents in dark clothing, your Uncles flown over to say their final goodbyes, and the priest.
The church, so beautiful surely someone would recognise it.
The grave yard where they laid her to rest so far from home.
Today my Mum is visiting the grave of her Gran. After months of research, emails to and from Rome, conversations with strangers and hence a story traced, my Mum was able to discover where she was buried. Having lost her own Mum (my lovely Gran) 23 years ago, and her Dad and Uncles, there was no one left to ask. But she didn’t give up and I am so proud of her.
I wish I could be with her today. I know it will be strange for her, but I’m hoping she will be able to say goodbye to an old lady who she waved off on an adventure and never saw again. I can’t imagine how it felt to have her parents return home and begin the sad task of packing away her ‘Gran’ into bags and boxes. I imagine that’s why they took photographs…to give my Mum something concrete to see, some evidence of her Grandmother’s passing, and that she was treated well, that things were done as they should have been.
Thinking of you today Mum. I hope it brings you what you hope it might. And send her a kiss from me.
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March 15th, 2010 at 1:24 pm
Well done for your Mum. What a great thing to have done. Her Gran will be appreciating the effort right now. I hope your Mum enjoys the day.
Lovely post. x
March 15th, 2010 at 1:41 pm
((((Hugs)))) for your mum. My grandpa died just as he returned from a holiday, so while he is buried here, for us it was like he never came back, so I can empathise a little.
Well done to her for her detective work.
March 15th, 2010 at 2:21 pm
That´s a sad story with a bit of a good ending, I suppose. What a tragedy, though, but I guess Rome is a good place to rest.
March 15th, 2010 at 3:19 pm
Oh Jo, that’s so sad. x
March 15th, 2010 at 5:01 pm
Great post.
xoxo
March 15th, 2010 at 5:25 pm
Such a sad story, but glad your mum finally got to go and say her goodbyes to her Gran.
xxxx
March 16th, 2010 at 2:40 am
oh i got shivers up my back reading that. What a wonderful thing to have achieved, i hope it all goes well.
March 16th, 2010 at 4:24 am
That’s some journey, I hope it helped your mother.
March 16th, 2010 at 5:28 am
You have such a beautiful way of writing. It’s like liquid chocolate, smooth, soothing and addictive. Even if the subject is heartbreaking.
March 16th, 2010 at 7:58 am
I have very happy memories of Rome and only a few days ago reminisced in a post about the city. I hope it helps your mum to know that her grandmother’s resting place is in a city of such great beauty and amongst people who appreciate family and the older generation; somehow that seems fitting, if she couldn’t be in her own country.
Very moving post.
March 16th, 2010 at 9:00 am
a lovely tribute sandy
March 16th, 2010 at 11:34 am
How moving that your mum has gone to so much time and effort to say her goodbyes properly.
March 16th, 2010 at 12:38 pm
Oh how wonderful that your Mum has managed to trace her granny’s final resting place.
March 17th, 2010 at 5:25 am
What a wonderful thing your mum is doing. That must have been very hard for the family when her gran did not return.
CJ xx
March 17th, 2010 at 6:20 am
Dis Manibus…To the spirits of the departed…..and to your mum’s gran.
What a brave and loving thing to do. For your mum to go and for you to write about it.
Hxx
March 17th, 2010 at 8:11 am
That’s so sad but so lovely. xx
March 17th, 2010 at 12:56 pm
That is heartbreaking but I’m glad your Mum has been able to find her.
(((hugs))) for you both.
March 17th, 2010 at 1:48 pm
Oh bless her. I’m so glad she was able to do this, it will be so good for her to have that closure. I know it bothers my mum she has never visited her Granny’s grave.
My grandmother used to wear a mantilla exactly like that to church.
xxx
March 17th, 2010 at 1:49 pm
Oh bless her. I am so glad she was able to do this, it will be so good for her to have that closure. I know it bothers my mum she has never visited her Granny’s grave.
My grandmother used to wear a mantilla exactly like that to church.
xxx