When you’re a kid you make mistakes.  Sometimes they’re big, sometimes small, but if it’s you it’s happened then it can seem enormous, insurmountable and completely, wholly, the end of the world.

Born in the mid 70s and brought up Catholic, my small world seemed at times consumed by guilt.  Naive and yet I think, fairly aware or sensitive to adult situations around me, I often picked up on things maybe I shouldn’t have, and then ended up feeling out of my depth and quite alone.

After I lost my Gran I kind of lost myself for a while and there are things I wish hadn’t happened.  Having talked to a counsellor and a friend I know I was a child who made mistakes and got so many things out of proportion due to my self-esteem, but for a long time, as an adult, I looked back and blamed myself for things beyond my understanding and control.

Still sometimes now I look back and feel so cross and ‘disappointed with myself’, the little Jo, the 11, 12, 13 year-old Jo, and yet I know if it was Miss E or Miss M in that situation, I would cuddle them and hold them and make it ok.  It would just be an experience, something to learn from and forget.

So this is my number three in my 30 Days of Truth, something I need to forgive myself for.  We are so much harder on ourselves aren’t we?  Thinking about it I wish I could get myself a tardis, head back in time and give myself a hug –  I could have done with one.

I found the 30 Days of Truth at my lovely friend Cami’s .  The writing prompts are below if you want to join in.

Writing prompts for 30 Days of Truth:

Day 01 → Something you hate about yourself.

Day 02 → Something you love about yourself.

Day 03 → Something you have to forgive yourself for.

Day 04 → Something you have to forgive someone for.

Day 05 → Something you hope to do in your life.

Day 06 → Something you hope you never have to do.

Day 07 → Someone who has made your life worth living for.

Day 08 → Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like shit.

Day 09 → Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.

Day 10 → Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.

Day 11 → Something people seem to compliment you the most on.

Day 12 → Something you never get compliments on.

Day 13 → A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)

Day 14 → A hero that has let you down. (letter)

Day 15 → Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.

Day 16 → Someone or something you definitely could live without.

Day 17 → A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.

Day 18 → Your views on gay marriage.

Day 19 → What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?

Day 20 → Your views on drugs and alcohol.

Day 21 → (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?

Day 22 → Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.

Day 23 → Something you wish you had done in your life.

Day 24 → Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)

Day 25 → The reason you believe you’re still alive today.

Day 26 → Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?

Day 27 → What’s the best thing going for you right now?

Day 28 → What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?

Day 29 → Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.

Day 30 → A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself